Trusting people in Tenerife

Briz · #31 (**permalink**) 19-08-08, 14:59

Quote:

Originally Posted by CornflakeGirl

ha, you and i have something in common. even my husband says i am hard and that's how other people perceive me. that may be the case and i don't have a problem with people not liking me because i know that in the business i am in, i need to be hard or else they'll walk all over me and we lose out. i am becoming more and more distrustful of people here. not friends, obviously. you have a bunch of people around you that you get to know gradually and that you don't do business with, that you learn to call friends... but strangers i am very aware of and always think "right, what do they want from me and are they going to rip me off?"
as i said, at times i feel like tenerife is a magnet for such people. i wonder if it is because life is so fragile here. you rip somebody off and the next day you're off the island, nobody is going to find you...
on the other hand, rumours spread here very fast, too, so you could lose your reputation over something dodgy.

The "hard women/lady" term is often successful in negotiating, especially with someone of little experience.

It's usually accompanied with a whine and a reference to being reduced to a position of loosing money or many children going without food.

To be admired if done by an artist but irritating when adopted by most Europeans

Chip · #32 (**permalink**) 19-08-08, 15:12

Quote:

Originally Posted by CornflakeGirl

ha, you and i have something in common. even my husband says i am hard and that's how other people perceive me. that may be the case and i don't have a problem with people not liking me because i know that in the business i am in, i need to be hard or else they'll walk all over me and we lose out. i am becoming more and more distrustful of people here. not friends, obviously. you have a bunch of people around you that you get to know gradually and that you don't do business with, that you learn to call friends... but strangers i am very aware of and always think "right, what do they want from me and are they going to rip me off?"
as i said, at times i feel like tenerife is a magnet for such people. i wonder if it is because life is so fragile here. you rip somebody off and the next day you're off the island, nobody is going to find you...
on the other hand, rumours spread here very fast, too, so you could lose your reputation over something dodgy.

I never realised I was so hard till my Dad, with whom I had a business in Tenerife for 15 years, came to Thailand for the first time two years ago and left saying, "You WILL have to trust someone if you want to make a new life"

That really hit home, I am hard and I trust NO ONE, and I don't know why?? I have been brought up in Tenerife from the age of 16 till 36 so maybe it has an influence...I'm sure!

But when a guy whom we've know for 18 month here in Thailand turns round and says, "You are a real hard woman" I didn't know whether to take it as a complement or an insult!!

I only have faith in one person....me. Don't rely on anyone, nothing. Sounds really hard, but if anything goes wrong I have no-one to blame but me.

I'm sure some therapists could red into that!!!???